when you fail before you start

So, the other night, I was telling my husband how I've noticed some people in blog world do this "31-days" thing where they pick a topic and write on it for 31 days. I explained that I don't really spend much time these days reading blogs and didn't care very much about being a part of that 31-days-community, but that it seemed like a good challenge for me. I love writing, and though it's hard to find the time, maybe the goal of writing 31 days in a row about something would be good. I had been thinking about it for much of September, and even written a couple posts to jump start, assuming I wouldn't actually have time to write something 31 days in a row. (Does that defeat the purpose? I don't know. Probably. #imakemyownrules)

So, my sweet husband listened intently as I went on to describe my chosen topic along with my first few posts in more detail than he might have cared for. (He is a VERY good listener. Actually, he is a great listener. And he has patiently taught me how to be a better listener over the past 4.3 years. I didn't even know I was a bad listener before, but I was. Let's call my current listening skill level mediocre. #workinprogress)

Anyway, he was listening intently as I described my topic. He laughed, responded, encouraged me, threw out a few more ideas and then he said, "But it's already October 2."

WHAT!?

It's October?????

[Aside: I almost never know what the date is. As a former public school teacher, who wrote and/or saw the date 283 times every day, I can't tell you what a weird feeling it is to go to write a check (yes, I write checks sometimes), and then wonder what day it is, only to find it is is 3 plus or minus days away from the date I thought it was.]

And so, just like that, I had failed before I started.

31 days was a nice idea. But, it'll have to wait until next October. Or possibly October of 2024 2074, when I am certain that I will not have any small children to care for (at least on a minute-by-minute basis).

Until then, I've already written 2 of the posts. (Yeah, I got a huge jump start...)
And I'll publish those this week. And maybe I'll write a few others on that topic this month. Maybe not.

By the way, have you ever failed before you started? Don't leave me hangin' here...
"I'm never going to speak like that to my kids again..."
"I'm going to eat paleo..."
"I'm not going to use that credit card again..."
"I'm going to read my bible every morning..."

or, wait for it

"I'm going to work out 3 times a week."

Yeah, me too.
But, did you know there is grace for that.
We will never be able to do perfectly what we set out to do.
And so, there is grace.
Grace to start anew and grace to make it through the mundane and the ordinary, grace to achieve your goals, and grace to accomplish something great.

There is a lot of grace available.
Give yourself grace.
Start over.
And if you again fail before you start... grace.